What Can Make Me Fall

There is one thing that will take me out of the running of Winner of Life.

Migraines.

Ugh.

I’m a woman who gave birth to two children, in spite of a reproductive birth defect.

I’m a woman who has continued working and running a household through two bouts of pneumonia.

I can care for a sick parent, coddle the other parent, see a cardiologist for one kid, and IEP meeting for another kid, and run a business in one day (with cape and combat boots, obviously).

But a migraine comes and I can.not.function.

Poe wasn’t here last night/this morning because he had work (he works nights). I knew that the combination of barometric pressure, my lack of allergy meds (no money to buy them), and my period – and their hormones – on the way was a perfect storm of a migraine on the horizon. And sure enough I was awakened by the searing pain out of dead sleep at 3:30am. I HATE THAT. That means there’s no way to get ahead of the pain with meds. I sent a poorly typed text message to Poe at that moment to bring home allergy sinus headache medicine (the good stuff behind the counter you have sign your life away for). It has to be the stuff that says Sinus Pressure, or else it won’t have the good stuff meth makers use – hence the sign your life away stuff. I also had him buy “headache medicine” because all we had in the house was ibuprofen, and for me at least, that doesn’t work on any kind of headache.

As an aside? Apparently there’s no excedrin?? WTF?? Their site still exists, but they had a recall something like a year ago for a particular batch, and it was taken off the shelves – but it has never returned to our local stores. That was the one OTC that I could count on to work. I have no health insurance (for the grown-ups, the kids have insurance), which means I can’t go get the prescription stuff, ’cause I can’t afford the visit or the prescription.

There is just no way to explain a migraine to someone who has never had one. Poe finally understands. He had a brain variance about 9 years ago, which is where a portion of the brain sort of seizes up. While he recovered from that, he was left with migraines, so he knows the pain I’m feeling. So he literally walked in the door this morning and shoved the medicine boxes in my hand, and said, “Do you have something to drink? Do you need to eat first, or will you just throw up? Don’t worry I’ll take Logan to school, and I’ve got everything else.” He gets it.

So, in the middle of a migraine, with absolutely no meds, I managed to make sure two boys were ready for school, fed, clothed, and teeth brushed, and got one of them out the door on time to his ride. I don’t remember doing any of it. Then I took the meds, gave the rest of life up to Poe, and crashed for 4 hours, while the meds took effect. They have. I’m upright now. It’s still there, but as long as I stay ahead of the pain with medicine, The next two days will be painful but manageable.

If you have Migraines you already know this… But for those new to the game? Here are some tips I’ve learned along the way.

Have drapes on the windows and close them.

If you can get out of driving anywhere, do it. Otherwise, I guarantee you the sun’s going to hit a window and reflect back directly through your eyes and penetrate your brain with blinding pain.

Migraines are usually localized to one part. So arrange your body on the bed to put counter pressure on that part. Mine are frequently in my right temple, so I sleep on my right side, with the heel of my hand squarely on the right temple. If it’s all around, make sure you have king size pillows, wrap one completely around your head, and use your arm to keep it in place. Another technique that works on an all-around is a semi-tight ski cap. It seems to help with counteracting the “my skull will actually explode” feeling.

If you smoke, have a cigarette before you go down.

If you drink caffeine, have some before you go down.

Use Your Medicine every 3 1/2 hours if they are 4 hour pills. Otherwise you’re going to be chasing the pain again.

If you can eat something, eat something light as it may come up again. If you do throw up, get that medicine in your system again, even if you don’t want to.

Let the people in your household know what’s going on. Kids need to not yell, etc. In my house, everyone can tell that it’s serious, because I sort of turn a gray color. That can be a little scary for my kids, but at least they can tell Mom’s not in a bad mood, Mom’s in pain.

Let your partner help. My husband hates all my bodily quirks – not because he’s a jerk, but because he can’t fix it and make it better. Men like to fix things. So… I make sure he helps instead of sloughing him off, “No, it’s okay, I can do it.” I find it’s better for him mentally if he’s helping me, like he did this morning. He can’t take the migraine away, but by golly he can make sure I try to eat. (I am so lucky it’s not even funny. I love that man.)

I used to have Pre-Symptoms. They were very unpleasant. Numbness in my extremities, loss of peripheral vision, speech impediments… Very stroke like in nature. But! The good news about them was, they were precursors. I could try and head the pain off at the pass, and I was often successful. The last few years though, I don’t get the pre-symptoms. Just – no pain, OMG PAIN.

Anyway. If you have migraines, I’m sorry. I totally get you.