Sparks and Butterflies...

But aside from that, she's still completely normal

My Paranormal Experiences

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It looks like my blog is back up! I had to do a little yelling at my host. Thanks to Kendra for letting me know about it.

So… Paranormal experiences. Yup, I’ve had ’em. I have no idea why spirits might still be here. But I also believe that we don’t know everything, and we’re not meant to. A long time ago, I stopped saying, “it’s not possible.” Here, I’ll list ’em for you:

  • 4 years old – Stormy night, and I can’t sleep. I’ve ever liked thunder, still don’t, and so I was still awake. I started hearing voices. A LOT of them – all kinds, kids, women, men, and scary voices too. All of them were saying my name over and over, but not at the same time like a rhythm, so it was just a cacophony. Then, as the lightning flashed I kept seeing shadows on the wall. But they were changing. So instead of say, tree branches that would essentially stay the same, or move a little due to wind, it was all kinds of different patterns every lightning flash. I started screaming, and dad came and put me in their bed. They said it was a nightmare due to the storm and dismissed it. I say I never went to sleep. I can still remember audibly and visually that experience, so I say it was real.
  • 17 years old, summer – My great-grandmother Addie, 90, lived next door. She got stomach cancer. Literally from date of diagnosis to death it was 10 days. My mom, dad, and I took turns in 24 hour shifts to care for her. Keep her comfortable, proper morphine control, bathroom trips and the like. When she passed, I was not there, although every single other member of the family was. I just had finished one of my 24 hour shifts, and mom had sent me home (next door.) I walked in the door, and mom called and said grandma was gone. Later that year, after the start of school – so probably, about 2 months later. I had vocabulary homework. I pulled out the dictionary, paused, decided not to do my homework, and put it back. Grandma’s picture promptly came off the wall and fell on my head. I did my homework.
  • Now – My house has lots and lots of noises. Some of them I discount if the cats aren’t right there with me, ’cause frankly, they get into lots of mischief. Some are startling and nerve-wracking ’cause my bedroom is a huge room, with a stepdown into our office. That stepdown was an addition to the house, and was never insulated. So we here really loud cracks and pops from that half of the room. Every once in a while the pops will go in a circle around the ceiling and around the walls. You can follow the noises.
  • Now – Once, I was sitting at my computer in the office. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a boy come down the step and head towards my husband’s computer. He was the size of Logan, with his dark blonde colored hair. He was wearing a blue t-shirt, so I looked up to holler at him, because it was past his bedtime, and there was no one there.
  • Now – I recently recorded a video for a private collab thing I participate in. During the time that I was recording, it was late at night. Around midnight or so. I try not to stay up that late on weeknights, but I needed the quiet to record, and so I had waited for the kids to go to bed, and for Poe to go to work. Towards the end of the video I started to get really, really uncomfortable, and started looking all around, but saw nothing. All kinds of noises started up. Finally I felt a wave of energy push me from behind. At that point, I just stopped what I was doing and went to bed.

So. Do I believe in the paranormal? Yes, but I don’t have any answers as to the whys or hows. Do I have proof? No, just my personal experiences. Do you believe? Do you have a good story to tell?

Compliments

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How do you react to compliments?

Me? It all depends on the context. If it’s work related, I bask in them. And maybe do a little dance. And perhaps pat myself on the back. You see, I’m good at my job. I really am, and I know it. It plays to all my strengths!

But if it’s in any way regarding physical traits, I shy away, or deflect, change the subject, or tell the compliment-er everything that’s wrong with the statement.

What does that mean? That I’m not comfortable in my skin?

Hm. I consider myself to be a fairly competent and confident woman. This irks me, and I’m not sure I know how to fix it.

Voting Day

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Today is voting day in the United States of America. While votes happen annually or more for local/state etc… This is the big kahuna – the 4 year Presidential election.

I live in California. There are a few initiatives on the ballot that I think are “heavy hitters.” I was a little bothered that I didn’t even know they were up for anything until I read my voter information. I was surprised at the lack of publicity over the potential changes to the three-strike law, or the freakin’ death penalty. I mean, c’mon. Regardless of your actual stance on the subject, “do we execute these criminals or not” or “dude, do we kill ’em” might be important. Just sayin’.

Anyhoo… If you have the right to vote? Use it. If you don’t, you have no right to complain, and you’ve just shown your ignorance. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but it’s true. If you’re given some sort of say and don’t use it? You negate your ability to complain about the results. I don’t necessarily like everything about how the system works (for example, I believe we should get rid of the electoral college), but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to vote. I consider it a privilege, exercising my right, and a duty as an American. If I want my governmental body a certain way, than I have to use the legal device I’m given. If the rest of populace doesn’t vote my way, at least the hope is that the governmental body will reflect the wishes of the majority of the people of the country even if they’re all wrong.

The folks who don’t vote because it’s inconvenient? “I can’t get off work,” or “I work nights,” etc? No excuse. That’s why we can vote by mail. Poe works nights. He will be asleep, or at the very least not coherent, during the times the polls are open. So, instead, he votes by mail. I work from home (which doesn’t mean my time is my own – the clients expect me at the computer doing the work I’m being paid for). I have two kids. My elderly folks are next door. And? We have odd emergencies other folks don’t seem to have. Such as yesterday when my father came over in a panic ’cause he lost mom. Yes, really. Because I truly never know what to expect around here? I vote by mail.

The folks who don’t vote for reasons like, “it’s one of two evils,” or “I’m Libertarian and my guy will never win” simply don’t fly for me. Awwwwww, boo-hoo-hoo. Figure it out. You’re whining. Be an adult. Which leads me to another opinion.

I think a great majority of folks would agree with the above. But I also think you should REALLY VOTE HOW YOU FEEL. If you truly believe in the Libertarian party, then vote for Gary Johnson. If you truly feel Ron Paul is the choice for you, because he lines up most with your beliefs, then write him in. If you settle for voting for one of the “big guys” because you feel that’s the only way your vote will count, you’re not exercising your rights, you’re settling. I think that if more people would vote how they truly feel, that’s when REAL change would start. I personally am voting for one of the “big guys,” but that’s because I think one of them is the right answer for this election. I’m not settling. If I felt Ron Paul was the dude, that’s who I’d vote for, and let the chips fall where they may, because that’s how I think it should work. True, my guy might not win THIS election. But what if everyone started voting on their true beliefs and gut? What would happen? Would it upset the apple cart? Probably. But would the will of the people have spoken? Yes.

I figure this late in the game you already know what’s on the ballot and where your polling place is so I don’t have to smack you on the back of the head. But here’s a couple of places they’ll be tracking results if you need it:

Have your say. Exercise your rights. Be an adult. Be an American. Vote.

How to Abdicate Parenting Responsibility (and Have it Ridiculed on the Internet)

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I nearly forgot I was doing NaBloPoMo. That doesn’t bode well for the rest of the month.

Today’s post features me ranting about someone else’s parenting. Call it Parenting, You’re Doing It Wrong. One of the things I do in my professional life is provide advice in different categories via Skype. I do it through a service. I’m editing the below to remove the service, and make the idiot anonymous. The category this came through was parenting school aged kids. Also, I’m putting the rest below the fold – GRAPHIC WARNING: The discussion of sex (in the context of parenting) follows.

Here are my own opinions on the matter, before I post the discussion.

  • To parent a child, you must address all matters, even icky ones. Not to do so is a disservice to your child.
  • Sex, to some is icky and embarrassing. Even to parents. So what? Just because you feel embarrassed by the conversation doesn’t mean ignorance is appropriate.
  • Your morals, household rules, and religion does NOT negate the responsibility you have to your child. In fact, it heightens it, because not only do you have to have to make sure your child understands the world around them, you also have to provide context and what the mores of your beliefs are.
  • Not giving your child scientific, biological information about their reproductive system, puberty, sex, pregnancy, and STDs could be life threatening to your child.
  • Not giving your child emotional, relational, moral, and religious (if you are) information in regards to sex and pregnancy is irresponsible, and potentially emotionally and mentally damaging to your child.
  • Not giving your child information about subjects they WILL run into for the rest of their life is irresponsible and unforgivably ignorant.
  • Not talking to your child about these subjects because you’re embarrassed is selfish and immature.
  • Not talking to your child about these subjects because they’re embarrassed is thinking like a friend (a bad one) instead of as a parent.
  • Regardless of subject matter, breaking house rules is subject to consequences. For that not to be the case lacks discipline, and gives an example to your child that what they do doesn’t matter. Even though my kids have special needs, and break house rules honestly because of them, rather than disobedience/disrespect, does not mean there aren’t consequences. It just means we take everything into consideration.
  • It is okay to have your child learn from another source, should the other source be more knowledgeable. Examples include giving them books on other subjects, or enrolling them in a class (in fact I know a teacher on the subject!) But that DOES NOT MEAN you get to abdicate responsibility for talking to them.
  • Just because you believe, or your religious scripture dictates, that something is wrong, does NOT MEAN they will not face the issue. Therefore YOU need to face the issue.
  • Finally… If you don’t give them the information, they will find it from other sources. ALWAYS.

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The Last Couple of Days

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So… Why did I sort of disappear? A migraine, yes. It was a sort of confluence of events that led that way.

First, the headache itself had been coming on for days. I’m very sensitive to weather pressure which I think is something to do with my ears and sinuses. Since we’d had rain “coming” for days, I was feeling it, and I knew I wouldn’t get relief from that until it actually did, indeed rain. Which it did all day yesterday.

Then Friday. Oy. Around 3pm, I was working, and I went to reach from my soda. I was paying attention to what I was reading on my screen, and my hand swept my soda across my laptop (pink, named Betsy). A full 12 ounce glass, and I spilled it ALL. I’ve owned a computer, as well as used company computers, for 20 years. Aside from feeling old, I have never ever ever spilled on my computer. Frantic paper toweling. Frantic drying and opening and tipping to actually POUR out the soda. After all that, my poor Betsy wouldn’t even turn on.

I work from home. All my work is on my computer. I wasn’t worried about my files – I use Carbonite, and my stuff is constantly backed up. But the physical computer itself… I need it to work. So I was faced with two problems. 1) Could I pay for a computer. 2) How soon could I get it, as I had to work Monday for sure. I actually still had work to do Friday, but could be put off. Since I’m taking off Thursday and Friday, I HAD to work Monday – Wednesday. I had enough money in my save for taxes account. Hate to use it, but frankly the computer is more important for the moment. Phew. OK, so can I access it right away? Call ING, since I leave that money in that account, since it’s a no-touch account. Yes, I can, here’s how. OK. Phew. So now… How do I get a computer fast.

My normal M.O. is to take time to figure out what it is I want, best price for it, search for additional coupons, and order online. That’s all well and good, but I can’t get it to me by Monday if I do that. Which means a Brick and Mortar store. ::shudder::

I don’t like people, crowds, or salespeople. So I made Poe come with me. We went to the nearest store Friday night. I made a decision. They didn’t have any in stock, but they could ship it for free! That didn’t help me solve the whole issue of being able to work on Monday. Oh, but look at this one – $200 more – not in stock… After the 4th not in stock, the salesman trying to jury-rig something together, Poe looked at me and said, “Let’s go home. We’ll try somewhere else tomorrow.”

I was terribly disappointed. By this time it was dark, and lights can trigger my headaches as well. We stopped for dinner, and then went home. On a whim, Poe tried to turn Betsy on. And she did. Sigh…

But I can’t trust her. I have no idea the extent of damage that might have been done and I need reliability. So, I went ahead and shopped online for what I want, and am waiting for shipment. So, I just need Betsy to last until then. Her sister will be named Daisy.

Friday night I went to bed, a little upset, and with the nagging headache I’d had for a week. At 4am, I awoke to a full-fledged migraine. I downed medicine and staggered back to bed. When Poe got home from work, I let him know what was going on so he could handle things. I ended up sleeping until 5pm. Sleeping isn’t quite the right word. Twilight sleep, I guess, getting up every three hours or so for more medicine. The only thing that helps is trying to stay unconscious, a cave-like atmosphere, and physical counter-pressure. In this case, as usual, it was my right temple. So I slept on my  right side with the pillow wrapped around my head. I got up around 5pm with the headache gone, and in the hangover phase, where I’m not quite there, and dealing with a fog. But since I slept ALL.DAY.LONG… That night I couldn’t get to sleep again until 4am. Which made the next day, Sunday, a difficult day to get anything done.

So… I’m grateful. Why? I found to money to replace my machine. I can work today, Monday. The migraine, and after effects, happened when I didn’t have to work. I’m grateful.

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