Solitude

It’s 12:30 in the morning.  I’m sitting in the easy chair, watching HGTV.  Everyone is asleep.

Solitude.

It’s rare in this house.

I want to write.  The process of getting words out in a space.  The restful clicky-clack of the keys as I type.  Emptying of my mind.

The problem is…  I’m in a really good place right now.  We’re more comfortable financially than we’ve been in a long time.  By no means perfect, but I no longer fear overdrafts, which is a huge relief.  I can pay the bills, AND pay towards debt, AND save, and it’s a huge relief.  In addition, we have a plan in place to bring me home.

The kids are going through their various therapies and thriving.  Plans are in place, they’re responding.  I still feel like strangling them daily – but it’s all normal, little boy, brother stuff.

Poe and I are strong in our marriage.

God and I are on good terms at the moment.  I still have ton make my own efforts – to study, spend time in prayer, and depend on Him…  But I’m in a much better place than, say, a year ago.

My mother is as good as she’s going to get.

So…  Even though on the surface I’m a work outside the home, married, mom of special needs kids, helping to take care of aging parents living next door, I’m doing pretty good.

Except for the fact that the inlaws are coming in 2 weeks.

But I have a cure for that too.  I hire house cleaners the day before.  Then…  when fault is found – I know a professional did it and seriously happiness will just never be found. Just the way it is.  I’ve learned to deal.

So – no big angst at the moment.  No big faith issue, marriage issue, kid issue, or money issue.  Do you know how rare that is?

Do you know how grateful I am?