A few random things from today…
This morning I said to Joseph, “You know money doesn’t grow on trees around here!”
I am now officially my mother.
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A couple people need me to tell them a few things.
First YOU! The Honker! I came THISCLOSE to getting out of my car and “talking” to you – but decided to provide a good example to my children. Let me explain… I’m sorry that the people in front of me got out of their car faster, and therefore left sooner than me. I’m sorry my children took a minute to be able to get out of the car. They were trying! But you HONKING… not just a short toot, but full on, honk honk honk hooooooonk… Come ON!My children were half out when the others in front of me left. Wnat did you want me to do? “Hang on boys, we’re going for a Ride!” I don’t think so. That’s unsafe. I know you’re late. ‘Cause guess what. I was late too. My own fault (well, no, it was the electricity dude’s but that’s another story.) And you don’t see me complaining. By the way… The honking in impatience while a 5 year old navigates his way out of a vehicle? GREAT example to your own children. Truly. And the bottom line is, you jackass, I didn’t do anything wrong. I was in front of the “Don’t drop off before this point” sign. I was going to wait and pull up. But then I noticed the car in front of me had just gotten there, and were getting out too. I didn’t do anything WRONG! It was the equivalent of dumbasses who honk in a stopped traffic jam. Where is anyone supposed to go? Only this time, with children! And for your information, you idiot, you scared my kids. And THAT’s why I almost busted your ass. Oh, and the carline volunteer calmed them by telling them you were doing the wrong thing, and that they were fine, and mommy didn’t do anything wrong. I wish I knew who it was. I might sneak an announcement in the school newspaper, since, you know, I write it.
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And you liar! Who in their right mind bald-faced lies at work? I don’t mean white lies, or crafty manipulation to get your sorry behind out of trouble… I mean flat out lies. So bald that the others stuck working in this little twilight zonish orbit you’re in actually think that they’re crazy. Until someone says to you, “They’re lying.” And the light bulb goes on. Oh! That’s why nothing was making sense. Because it didn’t dawn on you that someone would be that much of an idiot.
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And what makes you think it’s okay to bust into a common cabinet and leave a mess for everyone else to clean up? I understand having to make refreshments for a meeting… But do you have to leave everything strewn across the counter? And actual trash in the sink? Leaving it for someone else (namely me) to clean up? Gee, just like home.
And dude, what was with the salt anyway? Who puts salt in their coffee?
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OK, I think I’m done now. There were a few other incidents as well. It’s been a really really long day.
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