Sparks and Butterflies...

But aside from that, she's still completely normal

How to do K twice?

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So.

Logan is going to be repeating Kindergarten. It is the right move for him, and have no problems with this.  And he (and his brother) are adjusting well to that idea.  He is simply delayed and “younger” due to his heart condition.

Here’s my dilemma.  The STUFF.  For example, do I use this year or next as his K picture?   I have a cute schoolhouse photo frame for each of the boys with a slot for each grade through senior.  Which one do I use?

Or the projects?  Which ones to keep.

I know this sounds like a stupid problem to have.  But a problem nonetheless.

Opinions?  Which is his “Official Kindergarten” year?  Anyone gone through this one before?

Cross Posted at Special Needs Parent

Opening Questions?

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I’m pretty open here.  I’m open about my past of drug addiction.  My parents/lack of parents/birth parents/abandonment issues.  My children.  My children’s disabilities.  Marriage.  Really.

So – I’m opening up for questions.  Got any?  Any at all?  Ask and I shall answer.  Anything you like.

A post you should read.

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So, there are those out there who say I shouldn’t be doing what it is I do. What? Oh, that would be writing about my life. You see, I’m exploiting my children. And they’ll hate me for it. And I’m profiting off of my website, and therefore, I’m profiting off of my children. And I’m invading their privacy.

Let’s get a few things straight.

Wanna know how much I make? It’s ok, I’m alright about transparency…

I make about $15 a month in advertising. I also make about $40 a month total from my Stars and Special Needs sites. That’s paid blogging right there, folks. On the flip side, I pay about $15 a month for hosting – but whenever there’s a change. Like needing more bandwidth, there’s a fee. I’ve spent $100 in fees in the last couple of months. Oh, and if I have a problem or re-design, it’s anywhere from $25 to $200 a pop.

Yeah – I’m simply ROLLING in the dough.

And before you say I’m just waiting to hit it big? Think this is my big break? I’ve been writing online since 1994. Yeah. 14 years. Ftp, notepad, and aol server space ftw! Remember geocities? and changing every single page individually and ftping every single page individually? every day?

So – I’m not waiting for my big break here, peeps.

This is my journal. Mine. If someone takes an interest, and I end up with a product, or something, or GASP! actual money? I say, Go Me! This is still my journal. Is it a business? Sure, it can be. I think my opinion and thoughts are worth something, yes.

Also – let’s make something clear. The children? Those kids? Those sons I love more than life itself? They came into MY life, sweethearts! Not the other way around. I do not exist solely to serve them. I do it. I do it gladly. And no matter what I think when I’m at my worst, those kids are good, polite, have good moral fiber, and aside from their congenital abnormalities – healthy. In other words – I’m a good mother if their example is to be believed. But they are part of my existence right now. And I will write about them. Just as I talk about them. just as I experience them.

I don’t think it’s dangerous.

I don’t think they’ll be harmed any more than their natural abhorrence of all things parent will harm them.

I don’t think their photos being on my website will incite the pedophiles.

I’m not going to plaster my address all over the ever loving place – but Dooce makes an excellent point. Are we to live in fear of those strangers that see my kid at the grocery store, who saw my kid in person, and even saw my license plate, and even could follow me home?

I’m not going to live in fear.

Why do I write publicly? I write for three reasons.

I have to. I have an uncontrollable urge to spill my guts out – the pretty and ugly ones.

I am journaling my life. Each year, I have my blog printed in paperback form, and keep it for posterity.

I meet other people like me. Because I interact with other people like me. Because I can exchange ideas with other women. This is an opportunity I would not have outside of my blogging community.So – I’m sorry if you think I’m some, “money grubbing mommyblogger (said with as much scorn as possible) pimping out their child and whoring themselves.”

I’m not going to stop doing it until I no longer have the urge to write.

Posts on the subject:

Hormones Suck

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The last few days have been hard.

I think it’s been hormones.

I’ve been just DRAGGING through the days, completely exhausted despite extra sleep.  No motivation to do anything, be it yucky stuff like cleaning, fun stuff like blogging, or have-to stuff like work.  And the crabbiness.  Seriously.  Like the world was out to get me.

I woke up much better today.  So – either I was ovulating, or my period’s going to magically appear in a couple of days.  My cycle’s wonky, so take your pick.

All I know, is I’m happy to be joining the land of the living again.  Having energy and motivation is not something to take for granted.

Tell me that at 3pm today when I hit the wall, mmmmkay?

Don’t mess with me

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I am in one hell of a mood today.

Seriously.

We had to be out of the house a half hour earlier today for a Logan meeting at school.  Well you know what?  That sucks.  I have my kids trained to a simple morning routine.  They know what to do, and what to expect as do I.  I’m not a morning person, so it’s important to keep to the script man.

But Noooooo.  The school decides that before school is better for meetings.  I got everyone together, and everything is fine, and no one is late.  Great.

Except that now my brain is a pile of mush.  And then I get to work, and there’s no milk for my coffee or my cereal.  You see, yesterday, my order for milk came.  Someone at work told the delivery person to put the stuff in the file room, and then didn’t tell anyone else it was there.  Nor did they ask about perishables.  Which we have a lot of – this is not new nor is it rocket science.  As a result, I’m out of milk, and that delivery was cottage cheese.

No breakfast for me.

I knew about the milk.  But I couldn’t eat at home.  See above regarding routine.  And earliness.  And the fact that Poe chose today of all days to be nice and let me sleep in.  So I woke up a half an hour LATER than normal, when I have to be out of the house a half an hour EARLIER.  There’s math in there somewhere.

And I don’t want to be here at work, although that’s another whole rant.

Oh.  And when a craig’s list ad says “Editor/Manager” that screams editing and managing job, doesn’t it?  Not an entrepreneurial  “opportunity” where they expect 60 hours a week, no pay, and oh, they’ll pay you a percentage when the website makes money.

I don’t think so.

Dude.

Don’t mess with me.

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