Sparks and Butterflies...

But aside from that, she's still completely normal

Life Well Lived – Getting Organized for the Holidays

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As part of the BlogHer Life Well Lived series, we were asked this question:

The holidays make me so anxious! How can I stay organized this year?

It has taken me years to come to the point I am at. What point is that? The point at which I no longer care what everyone else does. Others’ perception of what I “should” be doing no longer matter.

I used to think I wanted the “perfect” Christmas. With the lights, and the presents, the traditions, the perfect children anticipating Santa, the family togetherness… Everyone in my life should receive a gift. My children should receive every single thing on their list. The biggest tree my ceiling will allow.

A few things that helped slap me silly: My children love Santa in THEORY. The man in the suit? Not so much. I have maybe two Santa Pics of my kids. They flat out refused to sit on that man’s lap – and speak? Oh Hells No. I am not going to force them. My children are not perfect, nor are they perfectly behaved. While I actively parent them, discipline them, and teach them, they are not, and never will be perfect. Nor is it their job to fulfill my own holiday fantasies. Money troubles for the last three years means that we have to prioritize how/what will be under the tree. And the work? All me, baby. Which means that this fantasy of mine? It’s all my fault and I’m a terrible person if it doesn’t come out “right.” Jesus seemed to be missing in all of this. In our house, we celebrate this season as a celebration of Jesus’ birth, and that’s a decision I had to make internally first.

So, I eventually started telling myself that I would do what I could, when I could, and how I wanted to do it. Some traditions emerged that my children remember, love, and ask for. Now… I make those traditions happen. I had a reality check of what matters. I prioritized. I took a gut check of what I could do, and was both personally, and financially capable of. That’s how I got rid of the anxiety.

I don’t have a list of organizational tips for others. Some of our traditions are not what other “normal” folks do (example: On Christmas Day, I bake a homemade birthday cake for Jesus. And yes, we sing Happy Birthday. To outsiders, it seems odd in a Christmas celebration). But my biggest advice is this; figure out what is true for YOU, and then create that reality. For my kids, husband, and I, some homemade fudge, and sitting down for a reminder that we’ll shoot our eye out? THAT’S Christmas Eve. Some new PJ’s as the ONE gift to open on Christmas Eve. Orange cinnamon rolls for breakfast. Nothing terribly fancy. Nothing terribly taxing. The only thing I do that I can think of as a true “tip,” Like Stays With Like. Christmas decorations are all stored together. During the season, wrapping supplies are all in one place. The gifts needing to be wrapped or hidden (wrapped or not, a certain amount magically appear overnight on Christmas Eve) are all in one place. I don’t stash. I stash, I lose.

Anyway – that’s how I lost my anxiety.

To see everyone else’s answers, and to add your own, just go ahead and go on over to the post, and comment! Also, you can enter the current $250 Sweepstakes.

Explain This to Me

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As an aside before I come to the topic on my mind… Mom got out of the hospital… and went right back in. That’s all I’m going to say because I’m rather pissed at some people involved in her care, and I just don’t want to get into it right now.

But – what I wanted to ask about.

OK. Most of my readers know I’m a “Christian.” I use the quotes because I’ve come to have some rather eclectic ideas. But that’s not the point. My question is this… Why are atheists now denouncing, taking down, or attempting to take down expressions of faith (examples include nativity scenes during this season)? If Jewish folks set up their menorahs, it does not bother me, and I don’t believe in their faith. When I see Muslim folks doing their prayers, it does not bother me, and I don’t believe in their faith. When I see expressions of other faiths, it does not bother me. I guess what the problem is, for me – if you don’t believe, why do you care?

This is an honest question on my part. Can anyone shed some light? It used to be mainly “You can’t do that in a government building!” But they’ve expanded past that example. So, my honest question is, if you don’t believe, why do you care so much? I only know one atheist, and I don’t believe she’s a reader, so I may not get an answer. We’ll see.

Where We Stand Right Now

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A catch up post of sorts.

My new computer doesn’t come until next Tuesday. I’m checking the website every day to see if there are changes, as this old computer of Poe’s is killing me. I’m a great typist, but there is something about this keyboard. I’ve got typos EVERYWHERE, and randomly keep turning on the Caps Lock key. And it’s very slow, and my efficiency has taken a huge hit. It’s all my own fault for spilling the stupid soda. I can’t really afford the computer, but I certainly can’t afford not to work. Sigh.

My mother is out of the hospital and is at home. As usual, they cannot find the source of the bleeding, and then she spontaneously stopped, so they kicked her out. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve been through this in the last 6 years.

I’m saddened by our lack of funding for Christmas this year. We’re going to have a discussion about Santa not being real, and I hate that the reason for that is our finances, and not my children maturing past the concept. I think I can squeeze out about $200. That should cover the new PJ’s (a tradition), bathrobes (a request), and DS points (another request). But that’s it, and that amount may be reduced if I can’t find deals on our Christmas breakfast/dinner items. I already have one gift for Poe, $25 on ebay a couple of months ago, which he’ll love. And I am making the other things, like teachers gifts, and I got those supplies on sale a few months ago.

I don’t know. Money sucks. While I’ve never been into spending a ton of money on extravagant things, I would love to have some leeway. It’s just not there. But. The good news is, we’re even. Poe’s checks take care of the regular bills, and then my checks take care of the groceries. So we have exactly enough to get by. But really, that’s not enough, because we don’t have extra to put by for emergencies. But we’re not behind on any bills, and I’m not getting calls from collectors, so we’re better than we have been in the past.

And… I Blew NaBloPoMo

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It finally happened. I blew NaBloPoMo. I didn’t post yesterday. But hey – yesterday was the 27th, so I did pretty darn well! I’m not disappointed in my showing.

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