Sparks and Butterflies...

But aside from that, she's still completely normal

Sorry for the Silence

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I’ve been very busy, which everyone is, I know. There’s lots on the horizon for us, which is, to say the least, scary. All potentially good, all change, all scary to me. As a result, my brain is scattered. This right here? Talking about the scattered? Hard for me to concentrate on. Because of the scattered.

Let’s see. Maybe a list form update on each area would suffice for today, hmmm?

Joseph: Doing really really really well with therapy. We have another IEP meeting this Friday for an update. He also keeps losing the teeth so fast I would swear he’s using it as income. His anger levels have come down to such that we can talk him down in almost every situation. I said almost, and I mean we’re in progress. Light years ahead of last year though.

Logan: I never know what to say about the little bugger. He’s a ray of sunshine with a dollup of thunder showers. Smart as a whip. And trust me, HE is the one we’re going to have to “watch” – not Joseph. He starts Kindergarten in September, and I’m not ready. I think he’s more than ready intellectually. But then there are glimpses… Where I know in a lot of ways he’s still a baby at heart. And I don’t want to lose that yet – He’s my last child. My last baby. I don’t want him to grow up yet – but he will. This’ll be the year. I could cry. But that’s my problem not his.

Poe: Turned permanent in a new job with a big raise and promotion from what his old job was. This is VERY VERY good for him. It’s very challenging for him, as he’s now an engineer, rather than a designer and all around technical guy. So he’s using math he’s not used since college. But he’s coming through with flying colors. This has the potential to be huge for our family.

Me: Work is work. Big things potentially on the horizon a couple of years from now there. Not writing as much as I would like. My brain is feeling to scattered (I may have mentioned that) to come up with organized thought for too long of periods.

Mom: Excited about the move (which I’ll mention below). Should be in a convalescent hospital for rehab, but won’t go – meaning my father is bearing the brunt of everything (running his house, and caring for all her needs). I’m more than a little pissed at her for that. Because she put her mom in a convalescent home for rehab after cancer treatment. Which was a good thing! But she did so she wouldn’t have to bear the brunt of everything necessary. I get that! Better care = faster recovery in my opinion. But let’s face it – that made things easier on her. However, she did not allow my father that reprieve, and now is making all kinds of demands before the move, that he cannot possibly undertake while taking care of her. Period. I love her. I know we almost lost her. But by God she drives me insane. And my dad to drink.

The Move: Note the capitals? Dun dun duuuuuuuuuunnnnnn. OK. Here’s the idea. My mother made my father promise that they would move and we would get their house so the kids could their own rooms – on her deathbed. He promised. Then she lived. Which she fully intended to do thankyouverymuch. He tried to back out. She laid the MOTHER of all guilt trips, as only a wife and mother can. “I was on my DEATH BED and you’re backing out of your PROMISE??” So yeah. We’re moving. Only moving away was just too much for my father to handle. There’s a little town not too far (maybe an hour) away that he would like to live, and get some acreage, but that’s just too big a step for him right now. So. Probably next month we’re moving… Ugh and the date is dependent on certain people I won’t mention because it just pisses me off… We’re trading houses. Which makes sense in a way. The boys get their own room. FinalllythankyouGod. And we’ll have the office separate from the living room. And we’ll have a table and chairs at which to eat. Which we haven’t had in 9 years of marriage. I mean my parents house is double the footage, with half the people. Plus the smaller house we’re in will probably be better for my mom’s getting around. All that being said and it still just feels STRANGE. I grew up in the house we’re moving into. And yet it’ll be so good! Bah. Mixed emotions. I think it’ll take a long time for me to get used to having sex in that house. Not that I won’t. But it’ll be weird. I’ve never done that before.

So needless to say with the doctors, and the packing, and the end of school activities, and the mother sick, and did I mention packing?

I’m scattered.

crappy

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Sorry, but I feel like crap. I don’t know if I have a sinus infection and/or ear infection and/or cold. So, it might be scarce around these parts for a couple days.

Pathetic

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I’m not usually a sports fan. But Poe came home with this story. I’m disgusted.

First, this happened:

St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Josh Hancock was drunk and talking on his cell phone at the time of his fatal accident, and marijuana was found in the sport utility vehicle he was driving.

full article on accident here

Basically, he hit a tow truck, which was there to aid a previous accident victim. So – Here’s this terribly tragic accident. I’m sorry for the guy, and his family. He’s dead, and that’s a terrible thing. But a reasonable person could argue that he brought it onto himself.

A) He was drunk, and an alcohol level of almost twice the legal limit.
B) Possibly high… There was a loaded pipe in the car. The toxicology reports are pending.
C) Speeding.
D) Talking on his cell phone. Everyone knows the potential for distraction there. By the way – He was talking to a chick making plans to go to another bar to meet her there.

Then this:

The father of Josh Hancock filed suit Thursday, claiming a restaurant provided drinks to the St. Louis Cardinals relief pitcher even though he was intoxicated prior to the crash that killed him. The suit… does not specify damages. Mike Shannon’s Restaurant, owned by the longtime Cardinals broadcaster who starred on three World Series teams in the 1960s, is a defendant in the case along with Shannon’s daughter, Patricia Shannon Van Matre, the restaurant manager… Other defendants include Eddie’s Towing, the company whose flatbed tow truck was struck by Hancock’s sport utility vehicle in the early hours of April 29; tow truck driver Jacob Edward Hargrove; and Justin Tolar, the driver whose stalled car on Interstate 64 was being assisted by Hargrove.

full article on father’s suit here

So, as stated above, I’m sorry for Mr. Hancock’s loss. I can’t imagine losing one of my boys. But… To sue:

A) The restaurant owner
B) The restaurant’s manager (who happens to be the owner’s daughter)
C) The dude who had a prior accident (he stalled when he spun out of control when someone cut him off)
D) The tow truck driver for taking too long

That’s just so wrong. Yes, there was a tragic chain of events. And it’s terrible that he’s dead as a result.

But when are we, as parents, going to start letting our children take responsibility for their actions? When do we stop blaming everyone else for their failures? This man was an adult. He made poor chioices that led to his death. He should never have been drunk behind the wheel. And yet you sue the poor sap who simply had a car accident prior to your son?

I know he’s grieving. I understand that, and as a parent feel so much sadness for him. But don’t ruin so many people’s lives because you can’t face that your son screwed himself over.

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We went on a desert trip… The Starry Safari at The Living Desert. First off – VERY VERY Cool. You go and have an animal show in the evening (it’s educational, we went with Joseph’s first grade class), then drop our stuff in our teepees and have dinner. Then a trip through the zoo in the dark to see the nocturnal animals. Then campfire, smores, songs, and bed. The next morning – bright and early, pack up breakfast, then another walk through the zoo, to see the daytime animals.

I really recommend it. But that’s not what this post is about.

Joseph has received a diagnosis. Disruptive Behavioral Disorder NOS.

NOS stands for “not otherwise specified.” In other words, conduct problems or oppositional behavior exist and cause clinically significant impairment but don’t meet criteria for a diagnosis of ODD or Conduct disorder.

With this in mind… And the excess stimuli etc, we weren’t expecting what we found… First off? We are WAY more strict than we thought we were. And really – we’re doing something right. Those kids ran amok. WITH THEIR PARENTS THERE. Now let me put this in perspective – we’re in a wild animal park… At night… With NO lights, other than our personal lanterns. We’ve been told, for our SAFETY, no running, no yelling, and stay on the path. The running and on the path rule due to the complete darkness, and the yelling because it disturbs the wild animals. Hmmmmm… It would seem that parents would want to enforce the children to follow those rules.

…not so much.

I was actually embarrassed for those parents. Because you, in my humble opinion, do NOT just shrug with a “watcha gonna do” look on your face. Had my children been acting like that, we would have physically picked them up, taken them to the side, and given them “the talk.”

But we didn’t have to. Because both the boys were angels. No, don’t look at me like that! Poe and I nearly passed out when we realized they were being this good. ESPECIALLY in comparison with the other kids. And I have proof. At two separate occasions, park workers specifically took us aside to tell us how well our kids were behaving, how polite they were, and that it reflects on us as parents.

We passed out again.

So, this proved to us, as we talked about it on the way home, that 1) Yeah – we are really strict and 2) It’s paying off, if we can take them somewhere with a little danger, exciting things to do and see, and other excited children, and they still behave like gentlemen.

Don’t get me wrong! They’re not automatons! The were really excited about the animals (Logan could hardly contain himself with some), and camping out, but they didn’t turn into banshees. Joseph did have a moment of almost tantrum because he couldn’t “go play too.” But when we explain that those kids weren’t supposed to be “playing,” (ie literally running around in circles screaming) he was fine.

There is one thing though… I think perhaps our kids were switched out for the trip. The proof, if their behavior wasn’t enough? Neither wanted chocolate on their smores.

Blasphemy.

http://michelewilcox.com/865/

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We went on a desert trip… The Starry Safari at The Living Desert. First off – VERY VERY Cool. You go and have an animal show in the evening (it’s educational, we went with Joseph’s first grade class), then drop our stuff in our teepees and have dinner. Then a trip through the zoo in the dark to see the nocturnal animals. Then campfire, smores, songs, and bed. The next morning – bright and early, pack up breakfast, then another walk through the zoo, to see the daytime animals.

I really recommend it. But that’s not what this post is about.

Joseph has received a diagnosis. Disruptive Behavioral Disorder NOS.

NOS stands for “not otherwise specified.” In other words, conduct problems or oppositional behavior exist and cause clinically significant impairment but don’t meet criteria for a diagnosis of ODD or Conduct disorder.

With this in mind… And the excess stimuli etc, we weren’t expecting what we found… First off? We are WAY more strict than we thought we were. And really – we’re doing something right. Those kids ran amok. WITH THEIR PARENTS THERE. Now let me put this in perspective – we’re in a wild animal park… At night… With NO lights, other than our personal lanterns. We’ve been told, for our SAFETY, no running, no yelling, and stay on the path. The running and on the path rule due to the complete darkness, and the yelling because it disturbs the wild animals. Hmmmmm… It would seem that parents would want to enforce the children to follow those rules.

…not so much.

I was actually embarrassed for those parents. Because you, in my humble opinion, do NOT just shrug with a “watcha gonna do” look on your face. Had my children been acting like that, we would have physically picked them up, taken them to the side, and given them “the talk.”

But we didn’t have to. Because both the boys were angels. No, don’t look at me like that! Poe and I nearly passed out when we realized they were being this good. ESPECIALLY in comparison with the other kids. And I have proof. At two separate occasions, park workers specifically took us aside to tell us how well our kids were behaving, how polite they were, and that it reflects on us as parents.

We passed out again.

So, this proved to us, as we talked about it on the way home, that 1) Yeah – we are really strict and 2) It’s paying off, if we can take them somewhere with a little danger, exciting things to do and see, and other excited children, and they still behave like gentlemen.

Don’t get me wrong! They’re not automatons! The were really excited about the animals (Logan could hardly contain himself with some), and camping out, but they didn’t turn into banshees. Joseph did have a moment of almost tantrum because he couldn’t “go play too.” But when we explain that those kids weren’t supposed to be “playing,” (ie literally running around in circles screaming) he was fine.

There is one thing though… I think perhaps our kids were switched out for the trip. The proof, if their behavior wasn’t enough? Neither wanted chocolate on their smores.

Blasphemy.

http://michelewilcox.com/726/

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