Sparks and Butterflies...

But aside from that, she's still completely normal

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Todo or Not Todo

October 5, 2011 By Michele Leave a Comment

I’m really struggling with a decision.

I’m not sure I’ve ever had this much trouble just making a damn decision. Procrastinating on following through? Yes. The decision itself? No.

Furthermore, the predicament has put me in a situation with a client I’ve never been in before – and I totally don’t know how to react, or what to do about it.

It’s particularly sad, I think, when a client comes up in my personal therapy. Sigh.

I know. I’ve been vague. That would be because the internet is forever, and regardless of the situation – I have no intention of publicly maligning my client on the internet. This is about me and what I need to do about it. Which, at the moment? I have no idea.

I got Interviewed

September 28, 2011 By Michele Leave a Comment

I got interviewed.

One caveat… She calls me a Mommy Blogger. I dislike that term. “Mommy” sounds to me like I have babies – my kids are 11 and 9, so that’s not true. Plus, I consider myself a “Life” blogger – I wrote before I got married and had kids, and I’m pretty sure I’ll be writing after they leave the nest. So, yeah.

Anna Deskins is a writer, and a huge proponent and lover of children’s books and reading to your kids. She asked to interview me – and the results are here on her blog, An Interview with Mommy Blogger, Michele. Go check it out.

Life Can Be Hard… Ya Think?

September 22, 2011 By Michele Leave a Comment

Yeah. That title is a little dumb. Kind of like saying the sky can be blue… Water can be wet. Ya think?

So, where the hell have I been? Right here. I work from 5am to 5pm with some breaks for things like picking up the kids. Work is rather demanding at the moment, and I’m still trying to get my feet under me. I’m learning to not make my clients’ emergencies my own personal emotional emergencies, if that makes sense. But? We need the money.

In addition, my mother needs much more care. So, that’s thrown in there, and I had to drop a few clients for that reason. I just couldn’t keep up.

And to the “friends” on Facebook who I don’t know who are friends simply to be game neighbors (ie, I don’t know them)? Your comments of “Where are you, I sent you stuff?” Unappreciated. It’s a game. I can’t play right now. Deal.

Then? Joseph had another 5150. For those not in the “know” – that’s the famed 72 hour Psych hold in the hospital. I simply don’t want to get into the details at the moment, as we’re still in the midst of the mental and physical cleanup and logistics. Suffice it to say though, it was nowhere near the nightmare it was last time. That… was the worst week of my life (and I’ve had a hard life).  So – that’s positive – it wasn’t anything like that. Short story, we spent 30 hours under guard. Joseph was under guard, not me, but we weren’t exactly going to leave him there. And finally one… ONE… social worker LISTENED to us. The first one after 4 shifts, and no doctor seen. She saw something in us that no one else who just wanted their papers off their desk saw. And she made the personal decision to advocate for us. Other that Joseph’s current personal team, she’s the first who I felt cared. Really cared. I hope she never loses that. Joseph is home because we convinced them to break the hold. Let me say that again, because it might be foreign to those familiar with 5150s. We convinced them to break the hold.

Minor miracles. Sometimes I think those are the only reason I’m still alive.

Princess and Snufflupaguss

March 14, 2011 By Michele 2 Comments

There’s lots’ of stuff going on right now. Frankly, I just don’t want to think about it at all, so I’m just not going to. Instead, I’d like to tell you a love story.

As a crossing guard, I spend a lot of time watching the grass grow. Literally. To remain sane, you become hyper aware of your surroundings. You begin to pick out patterns and routines around you. My “post” is across the street from a park. Many folks walk their dogs there in the mornings.

Around 8:30am, a large gold truck will park. An older, large man in his sweats will get out, hike his paints up a bit, open the back door to grab some stuff, and then will grab his dog. I have no idea what breed this dog is. She’s white (it’s totally a “she”), with curly hair, and on the large side of the small category. She’s totally perked up and ready to go. She doesn’t bark at anyone. She goes right to the grass to do a little bit of “business” and lifts her head and tosses her hair, and goes on to march around their route – which she picks. She picks the same one every time. This is one spoiled dog. On particularly cold days, she has a bright pink sweater on. On rainy days, I kid you not, she wears a yellow doggie rain slicker. (It’s absolutely adorable.) She wears her clothes with a panache that many humans cannot duplicate. I have named her Princess in my head.

On most days, another set of dog/owner come along to the park. Sometimes around 8:30am, and sometimes not. They walk there. The owner is a scruffy man with a large backpack and a visor. They vary their route, and the dog also picks the route. This dog… I don’t know what it is, but it looks like a small horse. I think it’s a “he.” He will bark at all large vehicles – not in a warning manner – more like, “Look!  A Toy!” When standing next to me (they sometimes cross to my side of the street), his head reaches my ribcage. He has very long hair. It is worn in two pigtails so he can see. His hair is so long that when you see him trot from behind, his hair swings in a very distinctive manner. Thus, I have named him Snufflupaguss in my head.

The magic happens when both Snufflupaguss and Princess arrive at the park at the same time. They will spot each other from across the park. At that moment, the music swells, both owners let them off their leashes, and they run to each other from either side. When they meet, their tails wag so hard, their entire bodies move. Snufflupaguss will lay down so Princess can actually reach him. She’ll run circles around his body while he just wriggles. I can tell from all the way across the park and crowded intersection that they are screaming, “OMG IT’S MY FRIEND! MY FRIEND IS HERE! LOOK! IT’S MY FRIEND!” After their initial greeting, Snufflupaguss and Princess will form a circle and go around and around and around greeting each other in the timeless way of dogs… Sniffing each others butts. Their owners look on like proud, indulgent parents.

When these two get together, and I’m able to witness the event – it makes my whole day. Joy. It’s everywhere if you choose to look for it.

From Your Friendly Neighborhood Crossing Guard

January 27, 2011 By Michele 3 Comments

As a way for my family to make ends meet, I took a part time job as a crossing guard for the last 3 months.  It is an extremely busy main drag in our town, a four lane four way signal.  Here are my notes:

For the Drivers:

  • See that sign?  It says “No U Turn.”
  • See those THREE signs?  They say “No Right Turn on Red.”
  • If I’m in the intersection – with my obnoxious neon vest, red hat, and huge red sign?  Don’t run the red light.  I’d like to live to see my children grow up.
  • Don’t stop IN the crosswalk.  If you do, I have to make the pedestrians wait another cycle of lights because you’re an idiot.
  • Don’t yell out your window at me, even to be funny.  At your speed, I can’t hear what you’re saying.
  • Don’t honk while right next to me.  I may pee.  No, I’m not kidding.
  • My hand signals are not for you.  If they were, I’d be facing you, making eye contact.  I’m not a traffic cop, and I’m not signaling you from the sidewalk.
  • I WILL give your plate number to the Sheriffs.  Also?  They like me.

For the Pedestrians – Kids and Adults Alike:

  • Did your parents really teach you to act that way?
  • Yes, I will yell at you if you attempt to cross the street IN a SHOPPING CART.
  • Also?  Use the brain God gave you.
  • Yes, I cross everyone.
  • Yes, I know you’re not a kid.
  • Yes, It’s company policy.
  • Yes, I get paid.
  • Also, it’s rude to ask my salary, seriously.
  • Yes, it’s a real job.
  • If you’re gonna get bitchy ’cause I broke your stride, use a trail or track – not the public street.
  • Did you really just do the “jogger snot rocket” thing next to my shoe?
  • Get off your skateboard or bike. Repeat.
  • Judging by your walking while talking on the phone skills, I suggest that you not try chewing gum.
  • “Thank you” never hurt anyone.
  • Don’t ignore me when I speak to you.  It’s rude.
  • When I tell you to hurry up, it’s probably because the light turned.  HURRY UP.
  • Tie your shoelaces.
  • I’m a mother, I can totally take you.  Do that again, and I’ll smack the back of your head.
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Wife. Mother. Daughter. Business owner. Please send coffee.

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