Sparks and Butterflies...

But aside from that, she's still completely normal

Dear AOL, I Am Not a Freak

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*Note: Some graphic biological information ahead. And another note? I’m ticked and therefore ramble.*

Dear AOL,

I was reading what passes for your headlines today and saw your article, “Dual-Womb Mother Shocks Doctors.” I had to click. Because I have Uterine Didelphys.

Thanks a lot, AOL. You have made me look like a freak. No, I’m not the new mom from the article. I’m one of the thousands (millions?) with this “condition.” It’s a birth defect. And it’s not as uncommon as you may think.

Yes, I have two uteruses/uteri. Yes I have two cervices/cervixes. I get to have double the pap smears! Had to have a septum between the cervices removed to end pain for both myself and my husband during “relations.” I also get to have double the hormones, double the blood, double the PMS. (Don’t you want to be in my husband’s shoes now?) I’ve been hospitalized for loss of blood during a normal plain old period. Oh – and I have two children that I gave natural vaginal birth to.

It’s not as uncommon as you think. I have even run into doctors who have seen it before me. Sometimes. But you see, there are no doctors who specialize in it, and no one wants to study it. Here’s what I know about it from my various doctors visits over the years, as I’m now 34, and have known about it since I was 17.

Yes, there is some risk in pregnancy because sometimes the uteri are smaller. Not the “shocking” thing you make it out to be. And yes, you can have more than one pregnancy. I’m proof. Your hormones can also be out of wack. You can also have abnormalities in your kidneys so you need them to have an ultrasound to be sure. You also get the added benefit of potential cysts on your kidneys and/or uteri (Yep – I have several.)

And maybe if the medical community decided to study it, you’d have some more information. But they’re not interested. Instead, my crotch is a revolving door when I go to a new doctor because they’re so fascinated.

That’s right – I just said I have a fascinating cootch.

Want to know how that turns out? In labor with my first, I punched a nurse in the face and kicked a doctor in the face. Why? I had 5 doctors fascinated with my COMPLETELY NORMAL birth. Thanks for all those eyes up my privates at my most painful and most vulnerable. You know, ’cause I’m just a freak.

Let’s go over the article.

Dual-Womb Mother Shocks Doctors

So, we know they’re not very well-read.

A woman with two wombs gave birth to a healthy baby despite warnings that the chances were unlikely.

You’re not a freak, you just need to be monitored.

…was born through Caesarean section

Obviously, I don’t know the mom’s actual medical information and personal case. However, if it was JUST because of the Uterine Didelphys in an effort to “save the freak” it was a totally unnecessary medical procedure with it’s own risks. Just ask my vaginally delivered children.

…who has two sets of reproductive systems, surprises doctors and the medical world by giving birth to a healthy baby girl

Really? The medical world? Shoot – I could have been rich 9 years ago.

Doctors told her the rare condition would leave her with only a 50 percent chance of having a normal pregnancy.

Really? According to what? The medical community hasn’t studied it enough to have any numbers.

Physicians told her that although Mirela is healthy, she is likely to be the her only child.

How irresponsible!! Doom and gloom, seriously. Oh and again? I’m proof. And if we wanted more children, my body could indeed go again.

Look. That child IS a miracle. As ALL children are. And yes, I’m very glad that the mom found out about her uterine didelphys, because to be responsible about her body she’ll need extra paps, and her kidneys checked out, and that’s extremely important.

But as a “normal” mom with an “abnormal defect” in her body – I couldn’t help but feel like a total freak after reading this article.

So, thanks AOL! If nothing else, you gave me an excuse to get on my soapbox. I have been contacted by several people over the years. I once wrote a freelance article as a Layman’s Guide to Uterine Didelphys when I couldn’t find any information. And women with this condition still track me down to talk about it – even desperate enough to track down my home phone number (I talked to that mom worried that her daughter was going to DIE for an hour,) because the “medical world” can’t be bothered. You know what? That parts ok. I’m happy to help them understand that they’re going to be FINE.

Sincerely,

Michele Wilcox

P.S. – That new mom needs new doctors.

Don’t Rattle a Mama Bear’s Cage

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Rather than go through the whole spiel, I’m going to copy an email with identifiers edited. Suffice it to say that we have been dealing with this issue for MONTHS. In those months, poor Joseph has been going downhill. And it might not have been necessary.

from: Michele {email}
to Dr. Therapist {email}
cc Poe {email}, Dr. District
date Thu, Jun 11, 2009 at 11:49 AM
subject Regarding Joseph {last name}

Hi Dr. Therapist,

Please feel free to forward this email to any administrative personnel who handle such things. I’ve also CC’d my husband and Dr. District with our school district.

I write, in all honesty, with some frustration. Skipping details, the point is that everyone involved in Joseph’s case felt that consulting with a psychiatrist, and investigating if medication for anxiety (or anything else) might be appropriate at this stage for Joseph. When the subject was broached, in was basically shut down by {Big Therapy Center}, because it wasn’t part of his plan. So Dr. District went ahead and requested that his {State Treatment Plan} be officially evaluated to add this to his program.

Today, we met with Dr. Big State. She was his initial evaluator in 2007. We went through his case updating it from 2007. She was confused as to why she called upon to do this. Why? Because psychiatric care and medication prescription is already a part of his plan.

{Big Therapy Center} has his {State Treatment Plan} plan. Twice actually, once when he initially started treatment there, and I sent another copy when it was somehow lost. You’ll see his recommendations on pages 7 and 8.

“The Department of Mental Health finds that Joseph {last name} qualifies for mental health services under {State Treatment Plan}. {Various treatment recommendations redacted.} , medication evaluation and follow-up by a psychiatrist if medications are prescribed.”

Dr. Big State is going to write an addendum and say the exact same thing. “Yep, you’re qualified… and already were.” She went further on to say that this is the standard wording, and is ALWAYS included, unless the individual does not qualify for {State Treatment Plan} in the first place.

So. When can we make an appointment with the psychiatrist?

–Michele
Mother of Joseph {last name}

My anger is frothing.

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PMS Sucks

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I’m mad today.  I want to smash things.  I want to tell people, like my children and husband, what I really really think in my head.

This is NOT a clean room!  This goes HERE like every other 4 billionth time I told you!  Can you NOT unscrunch the clothes when you take them off?  What is so difficult about putting the game IN THE CASE!?  What is that SMELL?!  Hello?  Who taught you how to drive, moron!  I AM NOT THE MAID. But it’s all shrieked in my head like a freakin’ banshee on PMS…  wait a minute…

And I check my mon.thly (aside – love that thing) calendar, and huh.  I’m not particularly regular but it notes that I’m probably 1 week and 3 days away.  And then I realize I’m not actually insane.  Just hormonal.

Don’t cross me for the next three days.

PMS?

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First off, thank you so much for your – er – nippular recommendations…  Much appreciated, and I’m going to try some of the bras mentioned.  No bandaids though – sensitive skin and I react to adhesive.

There’s a joke in there somewhere.

On to another topic altogether.  I have PMS.  This is no surprise to anyone that knows me.  However, I’m finding that over time (years, really) it’s getting really bad.  Now I have the standard crazy behavior, and it’s to the point where I have to make sure I’m not making Life Choices during that time, ’cause it really could just be the hormones.  But I’m also finding there to be a lot of anxiety during that point in time as well.  Morbid thoughts – plannings of funerals – etc.  Not like suicidal or homicidal, more like, what if?  What would I do if?  It usually only happens in the quiet.  I’m only in the quiet in my car to and from work, and then in bed going to sleep, so that’s when the thoughts occur.

Like I said, it only happens during PMS time.  What is this?  I’m assuming just a strong PMS?  And is there any way to “fix” it without hormones of any kind?  I cannot take the pill, or the ring, or anything like that, because the side effect is migraines.  What do I do?

Update on the Tum Tum, er, Stomach

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I went to the doctor for my three month follow up visit.

The meds are working to control things = good.

The meds if forgotten means noticeable symptoms = bad.

I’ve had a fever for every single appointment = bad.

So, basically, I’ve been living with a low grade fever for 6 months (unknown cause).  The medications are doing their job, but not fixing things.  He thinks that I might have a bacterial infection in my stomach causing all of this, however, I tested negative for the H. Pylori.  He said that there are others, so it still may be a factor.  I’m starting up two really strong antibiotics at the same time for two weeks, and keeping my other meds the same.  Another three month follow up.  If at that time nothing’s changed, and there’s a noticeable difference when I forget my meds, then it’s another endoscopy for me to see if the hernia and ulcers have gotten bigger.

However the whole fever thing?  May indeed be why I hit a wall at 2pm and could easily go to bed at that time.  I basically forcing myself to get through the rest of the day and evening with my family.

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